There is something about seeing a person walking down the street with a wonderful bouquet of flowers. Whether it has just been received or at the start of the journey to its delivery. Whether for a sombre occasion or celebration of something special, it’s the purity of the persons intentions to attempt to connect with another. Sure, we don’t need to do that through physical gifts or materials things but the sight itself sparks some joy for me.
A moment shared and captured; a social media post of engagement, an up coming wedding, balloons outside a neighbourhood home, the sight of a stolen kiss by the sunset. Some people see these acts of kindness or love, and become envious, jealous and saddened by the reality that this has not occurred for themselves. Blocking out the part of the mind that holds a shared connection with that moment, a sense of empathy, a passing smile. If for whatever reason we are left feeling pain instead of love for glimpsing at these moments we deny ourselves of connection and dampen the possibility for it to be experienced in its full when it next comes our way.
Life does not go to plan and comes with the unexpected. Even in days that played out different in our minds they become disjointed and backwards to what we imagined. If we shift to expect the unexpected, view life as a perfectly imperfect reality we can harness the presence of each moment. Well we can try.
Let’s break that the hell down and pull this apart. I find myself at the airport, a place of departure pics and expensive coffee, a time where I never say no to McDonalds breakfast. If you stop and look past the mundane tasks and the unusually stale taste of the dry air-conditioning along with the bright lights, there becomes an incredible world of connection, love and togetherness.
The airport brings people together. Families, friends, soldiers, loved ones arrive from all over the world. Some are lucky enough to be greeted with a powerful embrace. Watching someone lock eyes with the persons to which they have been apart, the smile, tears and overdue hug is a moment of the purest kind of connection. I can sit back and watch this all day, getting lost in the experience that love and care can bring to someones face and body. Keeping in mind, I have no clue who these humans are, I still am able to feel the overwhelming power of connection they share. If you haven’t tried it, go and buy yourself a ticket to this destination, sometimes better than the physical place you’re actually travelling to.
For me this is a beautiful reminder of the importance and power of connection. Even an outsider, a stranger, a potential weirdo that shouldn’t be people watching, can watch an embrace and share a moment and become touched and emotional just by witnessing it. Everyone has the potential to turn a day around, to allow a smile or a laugh, a tear, a touch that may be just what was needed. I am very humbled to witness such love and connection and it reminds me as to why I am a therapist and who I am overall, that through connection we can heal and by reaching out to others we can instil hope. Hope that today might get better, hope that we become more available in ourself when we are vulnerable, hope that we can give and receive support and that be enough.
Change your perspective – “how lucky am I to have something that makes saying good bye so hard.” – Winnie the Pooh
Share something about yourself with someone else, offer an ear to a persons heartache, give out a hug, drop the L bomb to a loved one. Connection is key to recovery, to whatever recovery means to you.
If you or someone you know needs help or support reach out to a professional, a friend or the many online services out there. Stay safe over the Christmas period, as for some it is not as easy as it is for others.