Reignite Your Relationship:

5 Expert Tips for Busy Couples to Prioritise Intimacy

As the demands of careers persist, to-do lists seem endless, and the journey into parenthood unfolds, the flame of sexual intimacy can dim amidst the neverending responsibilities. As a member of the busy couple community and therapist who specialises in working with couples, I understand the challenges of maintaining intimacy in life’s demands. However, there’s always more to the story.

It’s not uncommon for couples, especially those balancing work and personal life, to experience a decline in sexual intimacy. The expectations surrounding intimacy may vary between partners, leading to feelings of confusion, frustration, and insecurity. The first step toward reigniting the spark is acknowledging this new dynamic and making intentional time for your relationship.

Nurturing a healthy and loving bond not only benefits you and your partner but also sets a positive example for your life together. Here are some practical tips to help you prioritise intimacy in your busy lives:

1. Establish Communication Channels: Create a dedicated space for flirting and exchanging affectionate messages. Keep this space separate from discussions about household responsibilities, kids chat or mundane convo’s in order to maintain a sense of romance.
2. Prioritise Couple Time: Schedule regular outings or activities together to break free from your routine and infuse excitement into your relationship. Divide tasks and focus on enjoying each other’s company. Ask each other what that might look like for each of you and your expectations for this to get a good idea of where you can go and where you are at.
3. Embrace Date Nights: Set aside time for date nights where discussions about work or household responsibilities are off-limits. Get creative with your activities to keep things spicy. Don’t forget to employ the ‘You, Go, I, Go’ approach so you both can feel special.
4. Schedule Intimate Moments: Now I’m not the biggest fan of this, but when we are super busy and it can’t happen organically, we need to add it to the maybe pile. While it may not sound spontaneous, scheduling intimate time ensures that you prioritise your sexual connection. Once you get past the initial apprehension, you’ll find that planned intimacy can be just as fulfilling as spontaneous encounters.
5. Check in’s: Ask yourselves and each other what else might be going on? Maybe its stress, maybe there is some tension between you… Bring in some prompting supportive questions like: Is there anything I can do to support you? Is there anything you need from me? How can I help?

Remember, rekindling intimacy takes time and effort. Consider seeking support from a couples therapist who can help you navigate these challenges and strengthen your bond. By prioritising your relationship and making intentional time for each other, you can reignite the passion and intimacy in your partnership.